Sidewalk Solutions

The German Grand Prix last week end reveals what we all knew – you cannot devide  one by two and get a whole answer.  Each racing car manufacturer has decided to employ two drivers and expects to produce one winner. Sorry this can’t work and has led to a conflict of interest based on the very complicated arithmetic of 1 + 1 = 2 not 1.

We all know that there are only ever two or three racing car manufacturers who ever compete for the world championship, yet we believe that any one of maybe half a dozen racing drivers can win the F1 Championship. Sorry, but when it comes to the crunch the “team” will decide who the winner will be.

So let’s start again F1 and let’s have one team with one driver and one true champion. After all 1 + 1 = 2 not 1.

Now that’s free of any conflict – except the healthy conflict on the track – not the board room.

So the UK public pension deficit is over £1.3 trillion!!! That means that there is no money in the bank for these 6 million Government employees who want to retire – mostly early. Now if they were private sector employees then hard luck chum! But no they work for the Government therefore they are allowed to accrue debt as if it were wealth. Unlike the great unwashed in the private sector who pay for all of this debt – the public sector masses get to ratchet up the UK National Debt without caring about who pays!

Stop it – stop printing money you politicians, stop creating your client state of dependant voters – whether you have conned people into relying on the State for “benefits” or “gold-plated pensions” you are nothing less than thieves – the definition of which is – “ a thief who steals whatever is readily available without using violence” – how about not paying people when you have no money to pay them with? Why not try that?

Meantime – how about starting up a new Bank – a Pension Bank. Now we will introduce all new born babies to this new arrangement.

“Dear Tom or Cloe, unfortunately there is no money left to pay for a pension for you when you grow older, so don’t expect any freebies from your Government, as we have no money left. But we have come up with a great new idea. From today we have opened a bank account for you – the money in this account (which has a balance of nil today) will be held for you in a safe place, we haven’t found a place that’s safe yet, but we think Zimbabwe might be fine. Anyway, as you grow up and start to earn a living, you will have to save – now I know your parents and grandparents don’t know what save means, but trust us, it is a cool new thing to do. What it means is that from now on, until you retire,  we will make you pay 5% of whatever you earn into your new Pension Bank personal retirement account.  Now remember, you will never have a state pension as the money has run out, and all your savings will be tax-free, and also free of Inheritance Tax, as we decided to get rid of IHT because we figured out that as you had saved all your life for retirement then any money left over should not be taxed – I know you won’t believe us but honest we won’t take your money! Oh by the way – you can put any amount of extra cash you have into your personal pension account, also tax free. We only ask that you cannot touch it until you are 60 years old, then you can have a ball!

I hope you have a long and healthy life and are able to enjoy every penny of the savings you have made for your retirement. As far as your Government is concerned, we are still trying to pay of the debts of your parents and grandparents, things are getting better though – retirement age will soon be coming down to just 75 years of age. “

So the poor diddums at the BBC cannot take hard decisions that might hurt someone somewhere.  So here is what to do Mr Cameron, as the next major changes cannot legally be enforced until 2016 thanks to the wonderful generosity of the Lefties in the Labour Party, let’s prepare them for what will be coming down their line. The British Beeching Cuts of 2016 and beyond. Let’s give them 6 years to live the life of untouchables one last time.  The chop is coming – and we only have 6 years left!

Let’s start by announcing the proposed privatisation and break up of the  BBC – I can hear the Private Equity Community lick their chops and begin to count out their stacks of pounds notes to get their hands on the crown jewels of world media! Would you like a deposit to help pay off the deficit now Mr Cameron – get the auction under way then!

Sky executives are as we speak reaching for their stress pills – oh no they are not making the BBC more competitive are they?

Just think how much stress all those over paid BBC people will have to go through these next 6 years! How many parties could they squeeze in? How many hundreds of employees could they send to the 2014 World Tiddlywinks Championships? How many farewell parties need to be organised, better book every available restaurant  within 30 miles of Central London. What will all these London Taxi companies do from 2016?

Oh we better make sure we stop the Tories by getting Labour in before they do this to us! Now maybe we should chat with David Millibum and see what he has to say – that’s it we will support the Labour Party – we at the BBC really come up with original ideas – don’t we?

One wonders why the UK should bother with at least 5 years of austerity ahead?  When they are almost certainly going to vote left again when the time comes. The Brits once a rather conservative lot are now fraught with fear – fear that someone somewhere might fail, that a Teacher might be fired, or god forbid a nurse could be made redundant! Oh shock and horror, the truth must be hidden at all costs.  We don’t want anyone upset, just increase our taxes and print a bit more money aaaaah that’s better.

A once strong and proud nation are buckling when faced with the  new realities that shake the “happy clappy everyone is a winner generation” that now rules the UK.  Cameron knows full well that playing to the Brits softer side is easier and a winner because most importantly of all it is not nasty.  The fact that hoards of Brits have turned soft and cuddly – with no losers anymore, is testimony to their lack of understanding that when things get tough the tough get going. That to fail is something that you have to learn from – on the road to success.

Maybe true once upon a time, but no more – no this generation chooses to take things easy, even when things are not. Today too many Brits are afraid to dare to do the impossible, to take  the road less travelled, unless of course you have a police escort.

The untouchables are in charge – the caring sharing politically correct control freaks of the left who determine the language, it’s meaning and it’s context.  Sack a Teacher who has proved to be useless – don’t be silly – climb a ladder without helmet and a safety rope tied to your waste with a safety net underneath held by at least two grown men, you must be joking.

Just watch the police spoke person at the microphone placed neatly in front of the nice and modern media friendly Regional Police banner describing not how the convict who was doing time for violent conduct was released early only to murder someone the next day plus put his ex partner on the critical list, then shot a policeman.  No she says in her most caring voice how her thoughts are with the families and friends of those affected by this terrible event. And tells the public not to worry the very people who let this guy out are looking for him.  Sorry madam, get off your media training course and go and catch the criminal that your system let out and failed to contain to protect those who pay your wages.

Britain needs more than ever to be brave – yes to learn from mistakes made when over the past ten years you have spent your children’s inheritance and have left them only debts  - remember the penny savings bank that a previous generation taught you how to save?  Go ahead and have a good time the ready reckoner ticks on with ever more debt just waiting for the next socialist who promises you education, education, education or maybe a free health service or tough on crime and tough on the causes of crime – and there you will be – voting left yet again.

When the Berlin wall fell communism failed why did the lefties not go down with them? Instead they came back dressed up as smart westerners with caring voices, new expensive hair styles  and spread their revolution on us. Communism did not get defeated, it simply rose again covered in thick butter.

Britain needs to fight back – a conservative radio and TV station would be a good start – now watch the left legislate against that one! Instead we have to listen to overpaid lefty media workers who have no interest in anything but avoiding hard choices.  Things need to change before the left gets in again – or we may see the Brits “left forever”.

I don’t think there was ever a time when people who worked for Governments were truly Public Servants as many like to call themselves. On the other hand, people who prefer to do real work in the Private Sector have become the new Private Servants of Governments who have wasted zillions on any scheme that will improve their chances of retaining power. As the Socialists and Progressives have demonstrated – you can soak the Private Sector workers much harder and for longer than the unionised battalions of politically-created jobs  that Private Sector workers alone have to sustain.

You see, Private Sector workers are the easy low-hanging fruit, and there are more of them, at least up till now. The great unorganised Private Sector masses pay their taxes because they are lied to by politicians who spin prudence and instead give them a future financial hell. Continue Reading »

Governments are under pressure to force supermarkets to increase the price of alcohol and to stop using booze as a loss leader to attract customers into their stores.

Now far be it for me to protect the innocent – but beware politicians with a cause who say that increasing cash flow to them will solve anything. I am old enough (oh yes I am) to remember the days before supermarkets,  where drunks could be seen staggering around the local pub. Yes believe it or not their were people with drink problems before there were supermarkets.

So now 50 years later we are such an advanced society, not yet a big society, that we need Government to sort out our alcohol problem.  Those who believe that increasing the price of alcohol will stop the drunk from drinking – please say Aye!  Well I am afraid the No’s have it.

So what can we do to try and reduce alcohol abuse. Well I am no expert in this, although I have to admit that I like a bargain of almost any kind and low cost beer is hard to resist, even for a Scot. But maybe we should first try and improve the education of our children and those adults who cannot help themselves in their abuse of the demon drink.

How about putting a penny on every can and making these funds payable directly to a suitable, yes appropriate charity or charities. Let them who know the most about this problem be give the funds directly – yes the supermarkets will pay the charities direct, one penny for every can they sell.

The supermarkets and breweries would also have to give access and appropriate space (an even more precious asset for supermarkets) to certified charities in their stores. The charities will then be able to hand out leaflets and provide educational materials to their booze customers.

Money would be available to educate children on the need to treat alcohol carefully. My guess is that given 10 years of a penny a can can, the general population will be more aware of the dangers of over-consumption.

My other guess is that it will not reduce much the problem of alcohol abuse – but compared with giving the money to Government – at least we would have well-funded charities fighting the good fight, rather than politicians wasting pennies.

At last a referee gives Wayne Rooney a yellow card for swearing. We watch him on the TV every week as he gets away with insulting players and referees, hacking at players when he thinks he is going to loose the ball.

Well it took an insignificant match and a lower level South African referee – Jeff Selogilwe – to take Rooney Tunes to task. Jeff also warned Rooney Tunes as to his future behaviour.

Despite the vast amount of money he spends on media training and minders – the Rooney Tunes has been found out when he goes back to a level where it’s about football rather than “personalities”.

Well done Jeff – you struck a blow for the well-behaved sportsman – Rooney Tunes does not deserve to be a mentor (like) or a leader (like) of young people (like). He needs someone like Jeff to teach him how to behave (like) at no cost.

There’s nothing like a bruterstar being taken down a peg by a nice guy.

Who thinks Rooney Tunes will learn from this? Answers to Rooney Tunes c/o Liverpool (like).  Rooney Tunes never listened to the great Fergie or Capello, will he listen to the even greater Jeff Selogilwe – will Fergie or Capello listen?

One small step for man, one giant step for common sense.

Milo is nearly 3 years old and has now taught us how to live with a Beagle!

Let’s say you work for British Airways, well that is if you are not on strike at the moment, or maybe you worked for the old Woolworth Stores or maybe you are a teacher at a failing school, or maybe the failed Labour Party in the UK – how about a Social Services Department that has a reputation for making and repeating mistakes – make your own list of failures past, present, and yes future.

If you have worked,  are currently working or are thinking of working for a failed or failing organisations – here’s a tip.  Take some time out and compare the results of that company / classroom / school / public services department / shop / airline / business / institution with the Best in Class in your sector.  Find the best company or organisation / institution in your sector, go and visit the classroom / school /university with the best results, visit a public service organisation (I know it’s hard)  that you admire for it’s World-Class Customer Service. Spend time and hang out with those organisations who are market leaders or public “service” leaders in your chosen field.

Don’t ask your boss / union official/ party leader / busy-body or nosy-parker for permission for time to do your research – just do it.  Now when you come back to your organisation with your new thoughts and ideas for change – take a deep breath and start to make the changes that you have seen work in Best in Class organisations.

The solution is always there – it is really easy to find – more difficult to execute and the most worthwhile of activities – or just continue to  be a passenger on the road to nowhere.  Now c’mon benchmarking is fun - just make sure you choose a winner to benchmark against your own organisation! Send us your results and observations!

“There will be trouble ahead
But while there’s money and freebies
And dole and no chance
Let’s face the music then dance

Before the bankers have fled
Before they ask us to pay the bill
And while we still
Have the chance
Let’s face the music then dance

Soon We’ll be without the NHS
Humming a different tune
And then

There will be teardrops to shed
So while there’s money and freebies
And dole and no chance
Let’s face the music then dance,  dance
Let’s face the music then dance”

(with apologies to Irving Berlin)

The British dance floor is overcrowded with too many people employed in wealth-destroying jobs – 6 million public employees or thereabouts (can you imagine a company not knowing how many people they actually employ!) There is another 6 million who rely entirely on the government and live off benefits. That’s 12 million people on a small dance floor creating no wealth and leaving it to the rest to pay the bill.  How can Britain win the competition unable to dance free and shine like they can? Dancers need space to move and show off their talent.  Let’s clear the floor!

How about dropping the entry fees to watch us dance – say devalue the pound another 25% over the next 2 years (probably better to manage that than just wait for it to happen). Just think of what our French and German competitors would think of that. The Greeks would get it in the neck again! Our widgets would be 50% cheaper than they were just a few years ago. Bet the Chinese and Indian dancers wouldn’t be well pleased with that either! God forbid that the Brits could once again compete in making things on the world stage. All those Northerners, Scots and Welsh tradesmen would have to give up their non-jobs as community diversity and multi-cultural officers and return to being welders and fitters. I can just see them on the dance floor – Jack is a Welder from Wigan and Joyce has just left the NHS to start up her own Home Care business, don’t they look great. They both pay tax and rely on their own talents.

Well how about clearing the dance floor a little – let’s have say only 4.5 million public employees and the same amount of beneficiaries  (4.5 million)? That would save maybe £75 billion a year.  I wonder if we can get by with only 4.5 million government employees; nobody has ever asked me that! In order to be the caring and sharing people that Brits are these days, we could spread the pain over a 5 year period, to get the didums used to the real world after 13 years of being looked after by Nanny Gov.

If Jack and Joyce want to dress up and look their best in tuxedo, sequins and pearls they will be allowed to do so – a law will be past barring Government from interfering on any dance floor.  They will also be allowed to dance whatever dance they want – if they want to take risks and dance a Paso Doble then they will – the 250,000 health and safety officers will be replaced with a single Common Sense Zsar who will act as sole judge. Jack and Joyce will be set free to compete with the rest of the world. Dancing will become the biggest British pastime. The unemployed Health and Safety Officers will be offered re-training in mountaineering and single handed round the world boating, if a 16 yr old can do it they can!

So let’s wish Jack and Joyce well as they dance away from the old State to the new. Free of political correctness, saving hard for their new costumes, free from the fairness doctrine, free to win, free to come last, free to fail.

Britain can get over itself, because that is their only problem – themselves.

Jack and Joyce know there is trouble ahead – do you?